Holiday Excuses

So I'm going to say something that is PROBABLY going to make a few people mad, and I do not really INTEND to it's just MY personal belief and how I view things and I know that varies from person to person.

BUT....

I feel that parents that do not participate in the holidays because of "religious" reasons, are just plain lazy and cheap.  (Unless like your Jewish or something).  But I'm tired of hearing Christians say "we don't participate because of religious conflicts"  Pppllhhhgggffffttttt.  Is all I have to say about that.  What. Ever.

I do not want to lear that load of crapola.

You are just too lazy, and too cheap to participate in the holidays, because HONESTLY just how many of those same Christians really focus on the TRUE meaning of the holidays?  Very.  Few.

Those that don't do Halloween?  They just don't want to "waste" money on Halloween costumes or want their kids having candy, it's not about it being a "pagan" holiday because I'm pretty sure we can all agree it's gone waaaay beyond any of that now days.  No one is building mini devil worshiping alters and sacraficing virgins anymore (Those would probably be hard to come by now a days anyway). 

Some people are just cheap, and lazy.  Or they want to look "high class" and better than someone else and act like that is "beneath" them, holidays are too "good" for them.

If you aren't going to do any kind of Santa, then don't do Christmas trees or presents either.  It's kind of hard to NOT do Santa, he's everywhere.  Good luck explaining to your kids Santa is a fraud and a lie and a heathen part of Christmas.  Then let your child go destroy some other child's Christmas.  Yah, that's really awesome of you, really. Way to destroy a child's magic.

My husband is one of those people that admits he thinks holidays are stupid, and birthdays too.  He HATES how crazy I go over making things FUN and SILLY and MAGICAL for the kids.  He doesn't mind buying them a couple of nice presents for Christmas, and will help out the Christmas tree up (sometimes) and will USUALLY help carve the pumpkins (he refused to help this year still not sure why).  But he is a grinch of any holiday or birthday.  He hates it.  He thinks they are dumb. 

He doesn't see the point in spending the money on something so dumb (yet he would gladly spend money on things that I think are dumb, like....video games?  If I would let him).  I'd rather have a nice birthday party for my kids than buy a game.

Granted, I don't go COMPLETELY psycho on holidays and birthdays, don't have the budget for that, but I do what I can with what I have and have always gotten good feed back from others. So I must do something ok?

My husband flat out told me that if I wasn't around he would never celebrate a single birthday for the kids, or any holidays for the kids.  Just for the simple fact he thinks it is stupid and a waste of time and money. 

Why does he think like this?  Because he didn't get to have good holiday experiences, or good birthday experiences growing up.  So since HE didn't get to have them, no one should?  I think that's silly.  If that were ME I would WANT to make sure my kids got those experiences! Isn't that what parents do usually?  Give their kids the positive experiences, even if they didn't get to have them? 

I had awesome birthday parties up until I was like 8 years old, and then they stopped and I didn't have another one until I was 13.  Never  got a Sweet 16 either (just a strawberry cheese cake).  So I've always been a bit bummed on that, but I used to have awesome parties.  LOVED them! I also have VERY fond memories of holidays too! We never had a lot of money but I had a very crafty Mother who knew how to decorate for the holidays and she made it FUN! So I want to share that with MY children and give them positive holiday and birthday experiences.  Sure I might drive myself almost mad getting it done...but it's worth it in the end to see their faces.  What's wrong with a little bit of insanity ?  LOL

So yes, I do feel it is often times laziness and cheapness that makes parents not do holidays.  They just want to SAY it's for "religious conflicts" that they don't do it.  Don't blame your religion, be honest.  Just say "I'm too lazy and too cheap to do anything for the holidays or birthdays" it's ok, we get it.  We understand.

It really doesn't take much effort MAKE a Halloween costume.  Your daughter wants to be a Princess?  Let her put on her very favorite dress and swing by the dollar tree and pick up a cheap tiara and fake jewelry.  Your son wants to be a cow boy?  Put a pair of jeans on him (boots if he has them too) and a button up the front shirt (flannel is nice can easily find those at Good Will or Salvation Army) go to the dollar store and pick up a cheapo cow boy hat and fake gun. Not hard.  They have all kinds of cheapo costume stuff at the dollar store.  Cheap tutu's and fairy wings and wigs, and pirate or gladiator stuff, even stuff to be a clown.  You can spare $5 to make your kid  a cheap costume (skip McDonalds or Starbucks it won't kill you!)

I feel kids DESERVE to have these precious little moments where they are kids.  Parents are far too often pushing their kids into growing up faster and faster, they aren't getting to be CHILDREN.  We're going to have burned out adults going through their mid life crisis at the age of 25 because they never got to have FUN or find out WHO the are, they've been so busy getting knowledge and maturity crammed down their throats they didn't get time for anything else.  No wonder we have a bunch of neurotic children running around doped up on meds.  Parents don't want or can't handle their kids, just being kids.  Children being themselves, isn't "convenient" for them. 

I'll admit there's been a lot of times I'm stuck at home, ok so all the time.  I miss being active and hanging out with friends and going places (never was one for wild partying or anything, I'm reletively dull when it comes to "exciting" things that most people do or did).  But I do miss being able to do what ever it is I want and go whenever/wherever I want.  I'll admit some days I feel like my kids hold me back.  I'm not afraid to admit it.  The thoughts are fleeting, and never linger but they do occasionally come and go. Then I look at their sweet and beautiful sometimes sticky or grimey faces, and I think..."Wow.  These are my beautiful babies, they aren't holding me back from ANYTHING they brought me EVERYTHING, they've taken me EVERYWHERE!"  We've had some pretty crazy adventures since we've had kids.  We've gone places and done thing and met people that we NEVER would have met or known if it hadn't been for those precious babies.  I've had more experiences in the past 5 years since my daughter was born than I ever had in the 5 years I was out of high school! 

I love being a Mommy and throughly enjoy giving them any fun childhood experience I can! I want them to grow up and say "WOW, I had a pretty good childhood, we did a lot of things together as a family and had a fun time, I enjoyed being a kid!" 

Looking back at MY Childhood?  That's something I'm able to say.  I am sad that my husband did not have that, so I work extra hard to make sure OUR kids do.

Atleast my Mother in law appreciates all I do.  She admits that she feels awful she didn't get to do things, or didn't do things, or didn't know how to do things for her kids.  Her parents didn't do things for them so she just didn't know how, or where to start, and she was super young when she had my husband.  She was in a pretty bad situation so things just went south from there.  I know she feels awful now though, especially after hearing her son be so negative about everything I do with and for the kids (but he finally comes around even though he was kicking and screaming at first).  She's told him on more than one occassion that she WISHES she could have done even half of what I have done for the kids and that he should be glad he has a wife who cares about the children and wants to give them good happy childhood memories.  He just grumbles and goes off.  He really is a scrooge. He's my scrooge.  And I love him.  He's just going to have to get used to me doing what I do, and I'll have to get used to him doing what he does.  He doesn't bring our holiday or birthday cheer down any, we still have fun, and he still participates, whether he likes it or not.

Though he is pretty excited about taking the kids trick or treating tonight.  Though he was a pain in the neck about buying their costumes! (Usually I try to make them but the past 2 years the boys' costumes have been bought). 

Right now though, the kids are out the door and at school.  I have a mountain of a to do list, that I really do not want to do! Time to get started! The mother in law and sister in law and niece are headed down here today for Halloween.  So gotta get the house cleaned, laundry put away, and lunch started (I'm hopefully making GHOULISH GHOULASH if I can find my box of macaroni noodles!)

And P.S. I know parents are busy with work and life and it can make it difficult to do things for your kids, but come on...TRY to let your kids have some fun and be kids?  Don't be a stick in the mud, ok? Don't let YOUR life ruin your kids life? Don't make them grow up too quick they do that on their own anyway.

Mae